More Than Just: Conversations with Misfits, Entrepreneurs and Change-makers

More Than Just a Coach — Neha O'Rourke

June 26, 2022 Mel McSherry Season 1 Episode 2
More Than Just: Conversations with Misfits, Entrepreneurs and Change-makers
More Than Just a Coach — Neha O'Rourke
Show Notes Transcript

In today’s episode, I'm joined by career & energy coach Neha O’Rourke. In this episode, rather than talk about coaching, we go deep on love. 

Tune in to hear us discuss: 

  • Stepping away from narcissistic relationships & people-pleasing
  • Learning to just be & remembering that nobody does it all
  • One thing Neha LOVES that you’d probably never expect
  • Releasing the “shoulds” in your work & life
  • Identifying your purpose and your mentors
  • Why Neha is her own inspiration & why more women need to champion themselves


Links & resources:


✨This episode is sponsored by the amazing Molly Hebda Photography. Want a visual brand that’s as multi-faceted as you are? Follow @mollyhebdaphotography on Instagram & grab your FREE Visual Brand Planner today!


🙌 This podcast is supported by listeners like you! If you enjoyed this episode, we'd appreciate it if you could make a donation of any amount at this link. You rock!

Music. I'm your host Mel mcsherry on this podcast we share how we are more than just descriptors and titles that identify us and our lives our. And our. In the safe common room space you'll hear stories of success and Lessons Learned From Myself and other Misfits entrepreneurs and change makers my intention is to inform connect and expand our knowledge, so we can be mentally emotionally and financially. As we create the change we desire my promise is that from each episode you'll take away not only inspiration and a connection to someone you never knew before. But also the encouragement the action steps and the support so you can create what you. Music. One welcome back to another episode of more than just Mel mcsherry here once again with another fucking phenomenal human I know I say this pretty much every time and every time it's true and today we have the phenomenal Nao work. I did say that correct and I met Neha. We figured out three or four years ago at a luncheon at a networking luncheon and I've leave you had just started your business and I just remember being instantly like. We instantly clicked and I think we had virtual coffee like the week after that and then we've just been stalking each other and supporting each other ever since but before we started recording I mentioned the networking event and you made a face and I feel like there's a story. Would you like to share it no stereo story in which I'd like to share I just it's so funny it's been three or four years right and through that process of even just. Being really clear on who you are and what your community is it's so funny to see you know all the networks and communities you tapped into to find your tribe and I like look back at that and laugh just because, where we met was so different from you know where my tribe is today and at the same time I am grateful for those spaces. Yeah it's a little bit of trial and error with networking or just. You know when you're growing especially a business Community when you're you know Femme identified are women it's it's an interesting. Nick's that you can find yourself and and we'll just show I'm sure there's other listeners like nodding their head yeah we've all been there right thing is us two Misfits we were both there we met each other and we've been there ever since so I would just love to kick things off like I always do by asking you. What is your main title or descriptor and how are you more than just that first of all that is a fucking awesome question I wish more yes that question I would say my name descriptor is probably. Coach like you know I think a lot of my community has seen me in the online space coaching talking about my coaching business and especially as a Founder you know your business becomes a huge part of your life and at the same time I'm so much more than that you know there's so much to me that. Doesn't come online or that's outside of the coaching world and so. I think just if I had to put myself in at one descriptor that really did. Encompass everything I think the word would actually be what my name means and my name is love and I think that's what I am and the way that that shows up shows up in a bunch of different ways but love is really who I am. Ah All right beautiful well it's not surprising because I know one thing that I so respect about you one of many things is your boundaries with social media. And when you do take a break you take a loving break would you do come back it is like. It's so palpable of how much when you show up or step into a space, you do it because you are fully ready fully present fully just wanting to provide insights and I know that last year I mean we all had a really crazy couple of years but you know you're so beautiful about how you shared you know a lot of the things you went through last year and with this theme of love. How how have you cultivated that like how have you use that as one of your superpowers. That is a meaty meaty question you know I I think it's something that's always been innate in me to give to others but it wasn't always something I was giving to myself you know my parents are divorced I had a narcissist in my family and so I really in early childhood had been kind of subconsciously train to you know provide for others and give for others and give for others and through my journey of healing and becoming myself and burn out of my career that brought me back to my purpose and healing myself it was really just like a nun doing a nun learning so that I could. Give myself the love that I was so easily giving to others and I think the beautiful thing about giving it to yourself is when you come from a place kind of just like you were saying about the Instagram brakes versus going back onto social media when you're intentional and when you're full the way that you show up in the way that you're able to pour into others is so different than from a place of depletion and scarcity so it's been a journey it continues to be a journey but I I know that every day I can rest my head on the pillow knowing that like I showed up in love and I'm excited to make myself continue to make myself a huge part of that mission and journey, well and if you feel comfortable sharing if not no worries do you remember or was there like. A specific moment where you just went all right I'm done. With focusing on everybody else like this was the final nail in the coffin or was this more of a progressional awareness as you got older. Yeah that's if I really had to think about it and which is why I think I've leaned so passionately into helping people find a more fulfilling and purposeful career is because you know I had all these things going on personally right dealing with narcissistic abuse and all of these different things and I found myself being able to get through that and I was like okay I can do this I can do this and it was the. The career and like having those same behaviors going to my career right like doing everything the yes mentality not having time for myself throwing myself trying to be perfect and show up in all of the ways and it was that thing that on the outside was like the the tip of the iceberg the thing that just totally broke me but it wasn't the career it was all the behaviors leading up to that right but I think the career was like the Pinnacle of, I can't do this and it wasn't even a conscious Choice it was literally like. Mental physical emotional breakdown I have hair falling out I am crying every day my body is just like. Truly shutting down it was screaming at me and that's what was kind of like okay something's got to give like something has to change. Yeah wow so what was kind of that first little thing or that first little step because I know. And first of all thank you for being so transparent and so honest with this because I think this is one of the reasons why I wanted to have a podcast like this is because I know that there are steps that you can share with people. However it's so easy to like kind of gloss over the nastiness and just be like you know get put your perky face on and tell people the five steps or whatever it is to you know accomplishing x-rays that so thank you for sharing that so vulnerably and so beautifully. Ends I know the others like okay I'm feeling like this is well maybe worse maybe a little less however I know I'm feeling burnt out and stuck. What was it that you kind of did to start like unlatching you're in kind of start that reprogramming process. I think the first step was just finally saying no I mean to be completely transparent the scariest thing that I did was you know while I was breaking down I had just started a new job literally a month in. Mmm. And I could send my intuition as soon as I got there I was like this isn't this isn't what I thought it was going to be this is not serving me this is not this just isn't it and at first I was like okay I'll keep quiet Emily a month in. And then I tried to approach conversation and it was like you know no just stick it out like try it out will change some things what can we do to change and I still could feel like No And finally, I was like trembling and shaking and like I'm a month into this job and I'm about to quit like I'm about to say no like what does that look like on my resume what are people going to say I literally had, I was just shaking and it was so terrifying and I literally had like senior Executives tell me that I will never be successful again like the scare tactics of telling me that it's never going to work out I'm never going to be successful again and it was just like in that moment where I was like my body shaking I know with every fiber of my being that if I continue this I am going to totally combust like I can't keep doing this and and so I I said no and. It was so scary in that moment and then the second I got off the phone I was like holy shit we did it oh my God and I'm not going to sit here and say like since that moment it was butterflies and rainbows because right wasn't it was more of like meltdowns and breakdowns and crying no honestly I would say it like going back to your question the number one step I would say would be to say no but honestly number two and maybe even more importantly is like. Holding space to just be like you don't have that we always want to action we're like what's the next step and what do I do and where do I go from emblem and just like. Shut the fuck up sit down and just feel what you're feeling and it's really uncomfortable to do that but that's how we release it so just like be. Yeah I so happy that you said that it doesn't shock me that we're so I don't like that with that because I am the exact same. Belief and I haven't put that you know in my book she profits it's like. You need to feel what you need to feel because if you keep pushing where do you think that's going to go it's not gonna go anywhere and all of a sudden you're going to either you know. Implode on yourself or explode on to others and neither of those are pretty or helpful. So what can you do I would do it right and it's so bad I think now and it's so odd that I can now say this the newer generation because I know 40 the newer generation is. Better at that I was just my partner and I like to you know have coffee in bed in the morning and I scroll through I don't like to do a lot of news in the morning because I like to start my day off in a positive way. So I have this five things and it only gives me like five positive things that have happened in the news. And one of them was the snowboarder and now I'm spacing or name I believe it's Chloe Kim. Who won the Olympics she's 19 years old she's crushed it right she won Gold at 17 the Olympics before bad and the headline was she's taking the year off for mental health because she had a really rough year and she's saying fuck it. And I looked at him I was like there is no way anyone from his my generation and I have no idea how would your I'm not going to ask you but from this generation like Millennial Gen-X are right if we look back on any of the famous child stars anything like that they would have been pushed and push and push and push and that's what we grew up with is nope just keep pushing you know the whole Hustler mindset the whole girlboss thing which Crowley could be a whole nother topic a whole nother rabbit whole nother topic right good Lord just making an idea for another episode but, it's this new mentality that's coming about now that is actually really impressive and I think definitely inspirational to. That older generation that Gen-X you know maybe even boomer generation of oh we can say no especially women we can say. No and you know that question I think that we get a like how do you do it all or you know I want it all it's like. Currently does he know we know it's like I'm talking about like Utopia everybody has the same 24 hours as Beyonce yeah but Beyonce also has a cook and a nanny and a chauffeur and Anna like. We need to stop and I was I've talked about this in another episode we need to stop with this one line you know Mantra toxic positivity bullshit. It's like amen there's so much more than that. Hence the name of the podcast and it just came full circle we love those moments we love those of its. So with that said. I love this theme of love so I'm going to continue on this theme of love I would love to know because I'm a very naturally nosy person. What is something that you love either love to do or love to experience or just love and general. That people kind of raise an eyebrow when they hear about it like is there anything that you know people just go freely that. Yeah oh that's such a good question I really love rap like I think people like that like yeah like at a you know Indian girl who's a coach who's at this and then that and like, I my pump up music will just be something like. Hardcore like 90s rap and I don't think you I don't think you think of that when you see me talking about purpose and fulfillment and Maga that's a little bit of. What I want to bring to the world is like let's not take ourselves so seriously like we can talk about the important things without having to fit ourselves into these boxes so like I'm a coach who loves to like my mindfulness is not always meditating my mindfulness could be like turning on that rap and like dancing around my room looking like a fool or like you know just really simple stupid things like I'm such a weirdo and I walk down when I'm like going for a walk like you see me and I might just be strolling in my head I'm like in a music video to the frickin song I don't like where are we at the studio to choreograph this dance and also what I look like in my mind's eye versus what I would look like in the real life is different but who fucking cares because the Bible gives me is immaculate right I can't tell you how many times I've had like a great song in my head and on the CTA I just look at the poll just go wow man yeah nobody else is here I was just like do it to it Lord knows it would look like that yeah. Like it's those it's those little things right that really make us and. We are all weirdos we all are at soccer be a sign like and I'm sure nobody that's listening to this podcast is a straight-laced like murmur but anybody who is afraid of their weirdness. Embrace it sooner rather than later and do closet it I and I'm saying that to me like seven years ago because. I definitely tried my best to and I've been very you know very vocal about this on my social media and things but. I really did my best like fit the mold right to look like a coach to talk like a coach to cover my tattoos to knock hers to wear normal glasses and yada yada yada and. I thought that that is what I needed to do to be successful and separating myself into those two things of like. Mel who is the same way gangster rap like you know notes every single line to every Friends episode watches doctor who reads Harry Potter kind of thing. I would just keep that for people who are close and anybody who was a business Prospect I would keep things really like to my chest unless it had to do something with. You know trying to maneuver somebody into an offer get them curious you know that lead-in factor when you started off somewhere in between. Did you also kind of get into those pitfalls a little bit or did you. Were you always just 100% you and just out there for all to see and love it or hate it. Okay definitely was not always a take-it-or-leave-it authentic person I think my journey is a little bit flipped though so because I wasn't. Because I was not that person and so many areas of my life and this breakdown I had from my career at the same time I was planning a multicultural wedding so my husband is Irish Italian I'm indian-american so like, what does our marriage look like and what does our don't even know where to start our wedding because it was like what does that even, I mean and so I actually started somewhere in between as a Blog, to talk about how my identity never fit I could never fit in a box I tried so hard to fit in a box and I'd always by myself somewhere in between like I was never-ending enough for the Indian crowd oohs never American enough for American crowd I was we are wedding wasn't like our marriage wasn't that perfect fit I was never that like all of these things and I use somewhere in between as a space to celebrate all of our identities somewhere in between like we're not these like singular things and so I started out my business with this like radical acceptance of like. I want my business to be about helping you embrace all of your somewhere in between and show up in your fullness and not put yourself into a box so for the most part I was doing that and then there are little moments right we all the things that we're on our mission for our also things we have to learn ourselves it's just how it works and then right, so you know I had my and it's interesting every moment of you know should or scarcity or. Air quotes weakness was when the old habits would come in so the most recent example is you talked about you know me taking a break from social media and just for context for those listening I had lost. For people to the pandemic and it really was a difficult journey to go through and, I had taken some space in social media and the whole time I was away I had this like shooting of myself of like oh my gosh I should be showing up right on paper I might come back looking all rejuvenated I was in a daily Battle of like I want to rest but I should come back and like what's going to happen with my business and like all these things so that energy of like a couple times I try to come back because I was like oh no I should I have to come back and I'd find myself lacking the authenticity that I normally had in my cup fall like the the like Goofy and perfect wacky weirdo that I am that and that I like to show on social, wasn't there and I found myself being like just this I was trying too hard and it wasn't coming off authentically it wasn't resonating for me or the people watching so that was the indicator for me I'm like you know what I need to go back and like do me and really take it for me and then so I can come back and step into my fullness because. I'm doing nobody a favor by like forcing this to happen and so you know, I notice every time that I straight away from from my somewhere in between is when that happens so I think the odds sent Issa T is something that's an ongoing Journey but every time that I embrace that fullness it always works out. Mmm I love that hey friend like in the episode Pretty epic isn't it. Well guess what this episode and all others have been made possible by financial support and contributions from listeners like. So if you would like to continuously here how these epic humans are more than just go ahead and head over to our GoFundMe and make a contribution cool. All right let's get back to the magic I did a talk a bit ago at a forward event for Chicago for women and diversity go Michael Donnelly great foundation and I it was called heart mind bottom line and I was the bottom line speaker because my whole you know a lot of what I love to talk about is that profitability is threefold mentally emotionally and financially need to do the first two before the third even like make sense and one sentence that I I know is. Not is a trigger for need to be like oh is when somebody comes to me as a client and just as I know I should dot dot dot dot dot that's like. Yeah yeah dude yes I actually never say yes I go okay what do you want to do. Yep do you I know I should be on social media to you want to be on social media no okay so let's not be on social media let's find another way like we need to spend more time. Listening to that and really understanding, that you know there's a different definition to consistency consistency to me isn't same shit every day consistency is when I do step in it's the quality that I want to show others it's the value that I want to give others, and they crack a part of a tional poster of coffee mug t-shirt like all of the things. We need that message about yeah all right seriously I will we will buy like if you bring it we will come there we go up but it's true it's like it's so easy to. To say you know well it's a numbers game it's this yes ads like if I say yes and all the time and yes I did do improv but it's true it's like there is never a hard. Stop there is always an ago there's always a negotiable so what are your non-negotiables 100% then how can you built into that because that's sustainability right. Absolutely and I think a point that you made earlier about like generational viewpoints right a lot of. From my viewpoint I think a lot of the sheds come from society and what we see and therefore us feeling like we need to at that mold and recognizing that what's been before what you see for other people, may have served them or may not and that we're all healing energy generation Ali I think the beautiful thing about evolution is you know when you think about the Boomers and they were in like think of survival mode and that's what they hung their hat on and this is the next Generation that says hey actually we don't need to live like this and so I also think it's reminding yourself, The Sheds just because you feel like you've seen other people do it or that's what you think you should do from a societal perspective it's like okay and how can we allow ourselves to evolve out of the shows. Yes yes 100% And I think that is. One has been one of the quote-unquote blessings from covid is that. Because we spent so much time with ourselves as ugly as it probably had been for. All of us I'm just going to group this all we all had her mama was heinous there was nothing it is necessarily over however we're starting to get a little pockets of at least I can now hug you but you know the fact that we were forced to sit with ourselves and spend a lot of time with ourselves. I think that out of that has come a lot of curiosity as well as understanding of like shit I've been making all these decisions because I thought that's what I was supposed to do like it's these traditional patterns I had a friend who was in a company she started straight from college had been there for 20 years. It's just like this stupid ended up taking a two-year sabbatical and traveling. Because she finally had not finally but she had that moment of what the fuck am I doing and why why am I even. Here at I think the fact that we now have won a better idea of how we can create the environments that we want not only virtually but also with everything happening with you know and I know it's not perfect but hopefully the right conversations are being had with you know black lives matter and you know all of the API and all of this that. Finally we're having more of a constructive conversation of what is culture you know what is our business culture well how can we mental health especially as so. Beautiful just see those conversations because I never had this conversation no no no no no in front of me like I just kept my postpartum to myself I kept you know my body image issues to myself because you, it was either a person or nobody right and so I think now that we're coming. Out of this were merging out like a kind of like my weird amateur. Fantasia where it's the it's one of the pieces of music where they're showing Evolution and it's like we're crawling eyes like going now like yeah. Crack I try let's see this is this is why this is why you're my person but I really do feel like that's where we're at we're at this new. Age and I know you know universally planetary planetary yeah that's right word we actually are like there is a huge shift cosmically. And I for one am so excited to see. Where we go from here and having beautiful examples like yourself who are already. Fuck it like you you are you are who you are you not only you are you are you are who you are. Unapologetically as well as lovingly and that is such a beautiful yeah beautiful space to be in. Thank you and you know that's really a big part of our mission that somewhere in between the reason why you know I not only want to help people come into their purpose and live, abundantly and limitlessly and have fun in their life because that not only changes their experience but it also enhances, other people's experiences I truly believe that we are all here on purpose for a purpose but you know. When we step into our fullness and into our light that shines for others and there's a ripple effect that happens and you can see it in so many ways it's like you can be what you can see and once you know those resources like when you were talking about you know Beyonce and and the hours she hasn't a day versus what she has okay well when we look at what she has that opens the door to the possibility of ha isn't it interesting that I could probably hire someone to do the task that I would never want to do and still have an Empire isn't it interesting right and so the more that we all step into our fullness it gives other people permission to do that and we got to like live our life's Mission and I think that's just really fucking bad ass and really why we're here however set amen I'm curious those pop this question is pop into my head moving from a corporate job to an entrepreneurial space. How was your family with that decision because I'm always curious about the support they have especially you know someone who has a bit of a traditional family with being Indian American how was that transition or what was the support like for you from your from your family or from your close people during that transition. So I am actually incredibly incredibly blessed in the fact that my parents from a young age had always been like, do you can do anything you do whatever you want you follow your heart and it's so funny because like at some points they like boosted the confidence a little bit too much and they're like you're a great singer you should go saying and they like yeah okay so I got up on stage and I'm like oh my God that is has some parental love cuz. I love you but now you're just lying like that's just not cute like let's keep deposited in the confines of her home like it's not go episode that much okay like cute no but you know like all jokes aside. It's again another thing that I didn't fit into the traditional Indian narrative rightmost a lot of Indian culture you know people of my generation a lot of the bonding is around the kind of trauma of my parents forced me to be a doctor or an engineer or this and I can't fit into that narrative because my parents were courageous enough to say be who you are and we're going to let whether our friends or Uncle's or on teaser whoever thinks whatever. We're going to like let you be who you want to be and I think that's really powerful and it's also probably a product of their own experience right back in the day when they got divorced and then remarried that was a completely like taboo thing in our culture that was a thing that was like oh man like there's a little bit of Shame around at like you don't want to associate with those people or talk to those people and if I had to guess I'm sure, some empathy of their own experience probably blood into what they're allowing me to do and to be and I also think intergenerationally it's so funny I think about it from a cultural perspective right I'm in an Intercultural marriage which not too long ago was not accepted but when I look down to the lineage my grandfather my grandmother came from two different casts per se and they weren't allowed to be together and so they actually like stopped everything ran away had a love marriage and like built their they walked away from like all any like family money and you support any anything and they got married and like just like how their friends come and like an Indian culture there's a lot of gold and jewelry but they didn't have the money for that so my grandmother was just like. In flower crowns and necklaces and they just made out of flowers in them, love and so going back to love it's like they just showed up in that love and they open the doors for my parents to have that and now for me to have that and and that's why I mean when we step into our authenticity like not only does it like Ripple to the people around us like intergenerationally it heals and so I think that's just really really beautiful and Powerful wow what a great story. That is like some homework shit right there I know I'm like gosh this is so cool it what a great example of just. Yeah I just want a great example because I know it can be hard I i-i'm are you in the fact that you know my grandparents didn't have to run away get married but I grew up in an entrepreneurial household my dad had been an entrepreneur since I was little little so, the fact that I have never really had a real job didn't go to college my parents are like all right cool she's just figuring herself out and they've always been super duper supportive. And also which I'm sure you could you know contest you as well you learn a lot from your parents or from your examples of what not to do right of like, okay so you guys went a little bit too far this way your person and you kind of like mold it in so who would you say has been your. Biggest influence Mentor like if there was somebody that was kind of that either that first person you're like oh I could do this or and or somebody who has consistently just been a really. Beautiful support or example or mentor to you who would that be. Yeah I have two that come to mind so of course I can't answer in the Box I got to go out of the first the first person would be my dad like he has been through, so much hardship and the man just shows up with such. Compassion like he is the pillar of compassion will make any person feel like these are they're the only person in the room and he truly does everything out of the goodness of his heart and he's positive like he will not sit and dwell on like what went wrong but chooses to see. The joy and Delight in the positivity and the goodness in humanity and I just really admire that about him and his you know non-judgment that he brings which is a huge value that he instilled into me. And the second answer is probably going to rub some people the wrong way but the second answer is me yes my soul yes who I am deep inside. That's who my ultimate inspiration is the girl who made it through so much hardship and abuse and pulled did not let that be her storyline and that. Continuously at the age of eight was like you got a choice in your life. And when I need inspiration I look back at that person and that person is my inspiration and I aspire to be more and more like her every day and that's who I want to make proud and that's who I look up to, mmm naaaah crushed it that is a but that's awesome. And I have to admit that when you said people might get mad I was like oh man if she can say like Joe Rogan or something like that out no I. Yeah wow but you know I think there's stigma around women like championing themselves and being confident in themselves and it's not even you know to be like Oh I'm the shit or I'm the best or know it's literally like we each and I hope everybody's answer is my soul passed me who like who I truly am because every single person soul is the most inspirational. Entity that they will ever come across and I hope that everyone gets the chance to get to know that that entity because it's unbelievable. Absolutely it's like Snoop Dogg Snoop Dogg he's like first of all I'd like to thank me and it's so true because it's me like yes you can have all of the supports which you need right there's no way that you can do anything. Anything of significance but. To go through this journey alone is impossible and nobody should do it nobody has to do it nobody needs to do it alone and. You are the most important person in your life and in your business this is all coming from. You you are the source so having that connection and. You know that's one of the reasons why I really love using human design is one of the tools with my guiding is that. You have so much energy strength and so much inner wisdom my favorite quote is you have everything inside of you to answer the call of your soul you just have to find it. And it's hundred hundred percent spot is that if that flipping of the lens of like yes you can asks you need to ask for help you need to ask for support. And you don't need to do it in order to take that step forward right it's not a they're going to pull you, it's you're taking the step and you've got the people behind you it's that kind of supportive people who are you know it's holding space for you it's not somebody who's dragging you along and saying okay now we got to do ABC's you can get X Y Zed. Or are you thinking that you can't take a step forward because you don't have X Y Zed it's no you know you want to take that step so what is the first thing that you know you can do. Even if it's little of just like you know I know we're kind of hit or miss with social media but even if it's something like start sharing your story, if that's not comfortable start talking to people start just bean and spaces of like-minded individuals and and learning. How to have those conversations and how to bring yourself into. A space where you can be 100% yourself and then see what the support is that comes to you but you everybody abso-fucking-lutely everybody should be their number one. Inspiration. You know their number one cheerleader their number one like yeah I want to make sure that I am making me proud because at the end of the day whether you have a family or partner or not. You are here to take care of you first like the airplane you know put your oxygen mask on first help others now as a mom would I do that no I put it on my son however that's more of a fight or flight situation, but if it comes you know do I want to do something and I now have learned this I want to preface that I was not always the strong in this decision making. But if I'm presented with something that I just really don't want to do. And it's not in alignment with what I want and it's just because I wanted to be a value to somebody else and their dream or their mission. Man like no I'm good thanks it's like what I say all the time from John Maxwell like. You have to start saying no to the good so you can say yes to the best and it's like that moment of like quantifying it is this good. Or is this like full body hell yes and if it's good then really sit and think like where where is this really lining up in your priorities. And you know the difference in your body of a full-body hell yes versus a maybe right yeah I should you know like. There's a big difference sentence we are all taking out of our vocabulary as I know I should. Starting out everybody write down on their whiteboards I know I should in this but huge looking light across it because. You don't you shouldn't do shit if you don't want to wait shitting on her side and not herself, we love a good shit digestion is great we are not going to show what is your gonna help the others just flap hey. I'm sorry but what other podcasts can melt together so it's great like great motivation a great aspiration of the talk about poop at the same time I mean this is fucking Epic. Mike this is fit so far I could seriously talk to you forever and I am just going to say this right now we will definitely have another episode with you on because I know we have. More lovely layers that we could talk about but are there any. Parting words of wisdom motivation there was there anything that you would like to. Leave us with as we close out our time together no pressure, no pressure at all you know honestly the one thing I would just say is like. Listen to The Whispers of your intuition like there is if you want to fit into any box fit into your intuitions box because when you listen to the guidance that comes from within you are like. Following the Divine calling that's within you and never. I can say this with certainty never will there be a time where you follow your intuition and it steers you wrong now things might fall apart what you think should have been might change. But in the end when you look back, you'll know that you did the air quotes right thing and it's going to feel different so learn learn to get to know your intuition and to listen to her because that's your your soul talking to you mmm. I'm so glad that you said it may not turn out the way that you wanted to but it was still the best decision you made with the information that you had at the time like that's that's clutch. Beautiful so now where can we stock the fuck out of you how can we get to know you how can how can we spend some time with you. Come hang out I'm mostly on Instagram at somewhere in between coach you can also visit my website at SI B career coaching.com if you feel so called feel free to schedule a free consult where we can chat if you find yourself feeling unfulfilled burnt out any of the things and want more to embrace your somewhere in between I would love to have you, and just come say hi honestly I loved getting to know amazing women and I know Mel and I know the company she keeps and I know that this is a badass community of people who identify as feminine so I am honored to be on this podcast thank you so much Mel for creating the space for having me on and I know we were chatting before we hit record but the mission that you have is so powerful this space is so needed and you can tell that you're doing this from your heart space and she really is embodying what her soul is calling is for this for this podcast so if you're listening share it with someone you know and help her spread the love that she's creating. Smear thank you thank you thank you thank you so much for just being you and your continued. Love that you do spread every single day whether you consciously put yourself out there in social media or not I know that definitely. How you do the consistency quote unquote, that you provide when you do fully step in as just absolutely magical and I'm so honored to know you and I'm so grateful to have you as a friend and as a collaborator and all of these things so thank you for sharing. Your stories your love and everything else today. Everything that they had just said is definitely going to be in the show notes so please please please give her a stock give her a shout out. And we will see you all next time I do next episode see you all later. All right folks once again thank you so much for listening to this epic episode all of the resources and links connected to it will be in our show notes located on our website more than. Stop bus route.com if you like. So which I would be shocked if you did not go ahead and hit that like subscribe review and share. Also remember that this episode and all others have been made possible by Financial contributions and support, from listeners like you so if you would like to hear more stories of how epic humans are more than just pop on over to our GoFundMe and make a contribution. Also don't forget to follow us on Instagram at more than just podcast thanks again see you next time. Music.